Some how self help seems to be a strange concept when you are a therapist.
After all, if self help actually worked, who would need a therapist?
Wouldn’t it just be solved by the person themselves, without any outside ‘expert’ intervention?
This is the paradox I found myself in as I did therapy with people. So many of them would come in because all the effort they had made for themselves had not paid off in the way they hoped.
I didn’t want them to stop making their own efforts, and start relying on me or other so-called experts to run their lives for them. Were they meant to ‘outsource’ their relationships, their problems, even their happiness, just like they might outsource their accounts to a bookkeeper? No way!
Because there were some people who tried to do that…
“I want to stop smoking, and I’ve come to you for hypnosis.”
The more I heard lines like this the more I realized that they just wanted to lie back, disappear from the world for a while, and wake up changed forever.
They were handing all of the responsibility over to me – and worse than that… I was accepting it!!!
The dawning realization that I was being taken for granted, made me mad.
I became a ‘thera-pissed’.
Bit-by-bit my ‘therapy’ changed. More and more my work became about handing back responsibility to the person themselves.
And this is where this blog begins, and ends. With you – the person who wants changes in your life.
Welcome. I look forward to helping you to help yourself.
-Dr Martin W. Russell