In many ways this self help site is about bridging the divide between psychiatry and personal growth/self improvement.
So I watch the extremes of medical psychiatry, but I also watch the extremes of self improvement too. Tim Ferris is an example of the latter.
Tim Ferriss, author of the “4-Hour Work Week” is a really interesting guy, with a really interesting blog. The title of the blog is “Experiments in Lifestyle Design”. He literally means it.
Wacky, sometimes even wacko, and ruthlessly determined to take personal life to it’s limits.
Many things that will not suit most people, but here’s one I heartily endorse.
I use a variation of this technique when I work with people who are “stuck” in their lives.
To set the scene for this 3-step process, Tim is talking about the issue of starting up a company from scratch.
Perhaps that isn’t an issue in your life, but the steps are the same for anything that seems overwhelming or unachievable, and where pumping up the positives ain’t working for you.
How to re-evaluate your “weaknesses”?
1. Write down the positives of whatever you’ve been viewing as a negative. Don’t know anyone? You’ll be a fresh face and won’t have any strikes against you. No funding? It will force you to find the neglected options and set trends instead of following them.
…Hunger and desperation can be good things.
2. Consider the negatives of the opposites. What if you had too much funding? It would create a false sense of security and breed complacency, both of which are more fatal to a start-up than bootstrapping. It could also overexpose you before your product or service is ready. It could give investors too much influence over big decisions. Don’t assume more of something is 100% positive. It never is.
3. Look for dark horse role models. “I can’t start a company — I’m too old.” Coronel Sanders started KFC after 40. The excuse doesn’t hold up. Can’t compete in sports because of a bum leg? Sprinter Oscar Pistorius has no lower legs and is aiming for the Olympics. You? For each reason for inaction you come up with, ask: has anyone overcome these or worse circumstances to do what I want to do? The answer is: of course.
Embrace your lack of resources, your weaknesses.
Far from a handicap, these are often the pressure points that will take you the furthest… if you’re able to use them instead of excuse them.
I know many of you will be cynical about doing such an obviously distorted exercise.
In fact I suggest you read Tim’s whole post to flesh out these ideas a bit more:
In some forms of therapy they would try and explain to you the distortion was really in your original thinking, not in these new perspectives.
When I work with people who have become “stuck” in some aspect of their lives, whether or not they have psychiatric labels such as depression or anxiety, I want you to know that I have not found this technique alone to be enough.
So if you are cynical, it’s probably because a part of you has recognized that this is not a complete piece of change-work.
BUT… it is the best way I know of to loosen a “stuck” situation so that any and all other changes happen so much more easily.
So pick something you are “stuck” about, stick the cynicism in the back pocket for a moment… it will still be there for you when you’re done… and go back up and write out your responses to the steps above.
-Dr Martin Russell